Good Omens leads to my weekly show, book, whatever review

I have to confess I’ve never read Good Omens or anything by Neil Gaiman (other than Fortunately the Milk with the kids) or Terry Pratchett (I tried in high school but – my head – well, it still hurts.) so when my husband insisted my son and I watch Good Omens with him on Amazon – well, honestly I had no choice. I was sort of told I was watching it and I sort of had to because I’m a huge David Tennant fan. It was six one hour episodes, so like a mini-series and we binged watched it over a couple of days.

So we spent last weekend watching all six episodes while randomly covering my 4-year old daughter’s eyes or taking her out of the room altogether. And when it was done my husband looked at me, as he so often does after he lets me into a little of his world, and said: “So, what did you think?”

“I think I need to start the next book in The Mitford Series so I can escape into a very sweet, very innocent and maybe even a little pointless world.”

And that’s what I did. I put the thoughts of Armageddon behind me, even if it was a humorous take on the end of the world, and finally finished the fifth book of the Mitford series “A New Song.” As for what I really thought of Good Omens: I’m still very confused by it all but I’m still a David Tennant fan and I think even more so now. Yes, Michael Sheen was very good as well and I actually was able to stand Jack Whitehall for more than five minutes, which is longer than I can normally stand him.

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What was hilarious to me was how Gaiman got slammed on Twitter for making Adam and Eve black (hello… they most likely were). That’s what people were upset about? The whole series was pretty much mocking the Christian faith, in a way, though not in the worst way I’ve ever seen, but someone got their panties in a bunch over Adam and Eve being black? Um… okay? Weird.

After watching Good Omens, I saw an interview with Gaiman about writing that I really enjoyed.

As so often happens when I start asking questions about a favorite author of my husband’s, I ended up with another piece written about said author being shoved into my hand:

I can’t say I minded. It was very interesting, well written (of course) and the artwork outstanding. The story was intriquing, a bit baffling for me in parts (since I don’t know every incarnation of Batman in the comics), and definitely engaging.

Keeping with my weird, eclectic literary taste, I watched Good Omens, read Batman: Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader and then finished Jan Karon’s light, skipping through the tulips writing with “A New Song” (the fifth book in The Mitford Series) and then also, finally, finished All Creatures Great and Small by James Herriot (or real name Alfred Wight).

I thought I’d try a Debbie Macomber book since I saw an interview with her I really liked, but then I saw the pilot episode of a series on the Hallmark Channel, based on a series she wrote, and am having second thoughts.

The worse line in the Cedar Cove show?

“One thing she won’t have in the city are her memories because they are here in Cedar Cove.”

Uh … no … her memories are in her head. Dork. That newspaper editor who was supposed to have written that should be fired. Immediately. And if it that is how Macomber’s books read I may have to fire her too. We’ll see what I think after I read “A Little Bit Country.”

So, I approach my first Debbie Macomber book with a huge amount of trepidation, even though I loved this interview with her on YouTube (though less so the awkward interviewer):

Also in my queue to start this week are the following books:

All Things Bright And Beautiful by James Herriot

In This Mountain by Jan Karon

The Elmo Jenkins Trilogy by McMillan Moody

The Father Brown Complete Collection by G.K Chesterton

As for my blog this week, here are the links to what I rambled about.

A Story To Tell: Part Seven

Franny: A little piece of fiction

Justice for Michele

I Would Have Never Made it As A Pioneer, or The Day Smoke Filled our House and I called My Husband Before I called 911

So what is on tap for all of you this week in books, movies, or shows?

Let me know in the comments or leave me a link to your contribution for this week’s Sunday Salon, which you can find on Readerbuzz or the Sunday post which you can find at Caffeinated Bookreviewer.

Fiction Friday: A Story to Tell, Chapter Seven

This is part of a continuing fiction story I’ve been working on and sharing each Friday for Fiction Friday.

To catch up find links to the past parts below:

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Part Five

Part Six


I didn’t want to lie to Daddy and Mama but I liked being with Hank. I liked how we could talk all night about all kinds of things and I liked how he seemed interested in what interested me. And I liked that he wanted to kiss me and hold me when there were so many other girls who wished he was doing the same with them.

“Where is this Bible study?” Daddy asked lighting his pipe.

“Mrs. Steele’s.”

“The pastors house?”

“Well, no, it meets at the social hall, not at the house.”

I was a horrible liar.

Mama looked at the Bible in my hand. I couldn’t read her expression at first but then she seemed pleased and smiled.

“I think that’s wonderful,” she said. “We should let her go, Alan. Learning more about God’s word can’t be a bad thing.

The words stung. Mama was right. Learning about God wasn’t bad, but I’d abandoned learning about God to learn about Hank. I hated that Mama thought I had chosen something noble over something frivolous.

“Do you need me to drive you?” Daddy asked, laying his pipe down.

“No sir,” I said quickly. “Emmy’s mom is going to pick me up at the bottom of the road.”

“Okay then. We’ll see you later tonight,” he said, eyebrows furrowed, a sign he still wasn’t sure about this Bible study thing.

Mama took my face in her hands and kissed my forehead.

I thought I saw tears in her eyes as she hugged me and I immediately felt the urge to blurt out – “I’m a liar! A horrible liar and you should lock me up and throw away the key!”

But I didn’t say anything. I just smiled as she told me she loved me.

“I’m so proud of you, Blanche,” she said softly.

I was so ashamed of myself. I could barely keep from crying as I walked down the the road toward the covered bridge.

A sharp whistle cut the silence and I looked up and saw Hank sitting in his red, Chevy truck. He motioned me over, leaned across the seat and opened the passenger side door.

“Climb in,” he said. “I’ve got a different idea about what we can do tonight.”

I climbed into the front seat and looked at him, confused. I swallowed the tears I had been fighting back a few moments before and laid the Bible on the seat between us.

“I thought we were going to the movies,” I said.

Hank winked at me and shifted the truck out of park, pulling on to the road. “I changed my mind,” he said. “We’re going somewhere exciting tonight. Somewhere not too far away but far enough that no one who knows us will see us together.”

He glanced down at the Bible and laughed.

“And somewhere you’re not going to need that.”

I felt a twinge of guilt as I looked at the brown, leather-bound Bible my grandma had given me for my 13th birthday. My name was engraved in gold on the weathered front cover.

My heart started pounding. Going to a movie was one thing but driving with him somewhere outside the area was entirely different. My hands felt slick with sweat as we drove and I tried to dry them discreetly on my skirt.

“I’m not really dressed to go anywhere else.”

My voice sounded high pitched and hollow.

“You’re dressed just fine don’t you worry about that.”

Hank glanced at me and I felt my body grow warm as his eyes traveled up and down. He reached over and laid his hand on my thigh as he drove.

When we pulled up outside of a bar I’d never seen before, I felt even more apprehensive. I thought of all the times Edith told me I needed to have more fun I knew she was right; I needed to at least try to have fun for once. I’d simply chalk this up to a new experience.

I slid my hand into Hank’s as we walked in. He looked delighted to introduce me to his world.

The interior of the bar was dim and the music coming from the stage was loud. The singer reminded me of the music Edith had played for Emmy and me.

“You want a drink?” Hank asked.

“No, thank you,” I said. I’d never even sipped alcohol and wasn’t interested in trying now.

Hank ordered a beer. He gulped down half the bottle before grabbing my hand and pulling me toward the mass of people dancing in the center of the room. The girls, mostly my age and older, danced around me. The boys, dressed in blue jeans and white shirts with hair slicked back, danced with them, surrounding us with a swirl of colors and noise.

“I don’t dance!” I tried to shout over the noise.

“It’s time to try!” Hank shouted back.

From the stage a man wearing a black suit coat, buttoned down to reveal a white dress shirt sang an upbeat song about rocking around the clock.

Hank pointed to his feet, then, to mine. I could barely hear his voice over the music, but I knew he wanted me to try to repeat what he’d done. I shook my head firmly and he laughed.

“Come on, just try something new,” he yelled in my ear.

I shook my head but started to laugh as I watched him swing his hips. He held his hands out to me.

I tried the dance, stumbling and stepping on his feet, laughing at each mistake.

We were laughing and spinning on the dance floor and I was trying my best to keep up. Other people were bumping into us, laughing and smiling while dancing with each other. Together we were a mashed-up mess of youth and I loved it. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had so much fun.

When the song ended, people dispersed to either their tables or the bar. A woman with long, dark eyelashes leaned back against the bar, watching Hank.

“Hey there, cutie,” she said. “Here alone?”

Hank grinned reaching for his beer and seemed to be pleased with the attention.

“Not tonight,” he said, winking at her and sliding his arm around my waist.

The woman smirked, barely looking at me.

“Well, if you get sick of that little girl and want to hang out with a real woman, you let me know,” she said in a husky tone.

She pushed herself off of the bar, walking past Hank, bumping her hip against him as she walked.

Hank watched her walked away and shook his head, laughing as he took a swig from the bottle.

“Hey, can I get a water for the little lady?” he asked the bartender.

He held the bottle toward me. “Unless you want a sip?”

I shook my head, holding up my hand.

“No, thank you,” I said, guilt about lying to my parents already weighing heavy on my mind.

“You never have any fun, Blanche,” Hank said grinning. I knew he was teasing, but in his voice I heard my sister and the boys at school mocking me.

I snatched the bottle from his hand, sucking the liquid down fast, the gagging as the bitterness stung my throat and left a burning sensation in my stomach. I thought I was going to throw up on Hank’s shoes. I coughed, my face hot, while Hank laughed.

“You okay?” he asked breathless from laughing.

I nodded, still trying to catch my breath.

“We’ve got to toughen you up, kid,” Hank said, draining the bottle.

The man on the stage began to sing and strum a gentle, slow melody on the guitar.

Hank took my hand and I followed him to the center of the bar, feeling unsure of myself. He leaned closer as he turned to face me.

“You don’t have to know too many steps for the slow songs,” he said in my ear, placing a hand on each side of my waist. “We just have to learn how to move together.”

I didn’t know where I was supposed to place my hands for a slow dance, so I looked at all the other couples. I did what the other girls did and hooked my arms around the back of Hank’s neck, which only pulled me closer to him. He looked down at me and smirked, as we swayed to the music.

I’d never slow- danced with a boy, let alone a man like Hank. My heart was pounding as he leaned his forehead down against mine and then tilted his head to kiss me.

“See? Isn’t this better than a movie?” he asked, his lips grazing mine as he spoke.

I nodded and he kissed me again as we danced.

In the truck, his kisses were longer and harder. I knew he wanted more, but I pulled away quickly.

“My parents are going to question my story if I don’t get home soon,” I told him.

I heard frustration in his voice as he turned the key in the ignition.

“Darn those parents of yours, girl.”

He grinned despite the tone of his voice. I felt like a silly little girl and wished I was older, with no parents to rush home to. I wondered how much longer Hank would want to spend time with a child like me.

My question was answered when pebbles started hitting my window again two nights later.

***

The Sunday morning after I went dancing with Hank, Lillian pulled me aside at the end of the service.

“Blanche, your mother just asked me how our Bible study went last night,” she said softly, so no one else could hear her. “She said you told her you enjoyed it very much.”

I couldn’t meet Lillian’s gaze. I immediately felt ashamed.

“Blanche, you know the problem with all this is that we don’t have Bible study on Saturday nights, right?”

I nodded, my hands feeling numb like they always did when I was anxious.

“Can you tell me why you lied to your parents?”

I shook my head.

“I know it was wrong,” I said quietly. “I’ll never do it again.”

I looked up at Lillian, frightened.

“Are you going to tell my parents?” I asked.

Lillian’s eyebrows were furrowed, and I recognized the maternal concern on her face.

“No, honey, I’m not. I’m going to leave that to you,” she said. “But I am going to let you know you put me in a very difficult position. Luckily your mother and I were interrupted because I was not going to lie for you.”

I nodded.

“I understand and I apologize. I’ll talk to my parents today,” I told her, but I knew I was lying. I had no intention of telling my parents anything about why I lied or about Hank.

“I’m glad that’s settled,” Lillian said with a smile. “I am sure you feel you had a good reason for what you did but remember, God has commanded us to honor our father and mother.”

“Yes, ma’am,” I said.

“And also know that we have a women’s Bible study every Wednesday and we would love to see you there this Wednesday,” Lillian said.

Somehow, I felt the invitation was more of a directive rather than a kind outreach for womanly fellowship; maybe in exchange for not telling my parents I had lied to them.

Lillian’s expression was somber.

“Don’t forget, Blanche. The Bible tells us that our sin will find us out. I don’t say that to scare you but to remind you that God does not ask us not to sin because he wants to punish us, but because he wants the best – His best – for us.”

My chest felt tight and the numbness in my hands was spreading to my arms.

“Yes, Miss Lillian I understand.”

She hugged me.

“I know you do, and I know you are going to do the right thing.”

I didn’t know how to do the right thing without giving up Hank.

Lillian wasn’t the only one who knew I’d been lying about the Bible study.

“Jeffrey Franklin told me he saw you at the Mountain House with Hank,” Edith smirked, resting her elbows on the bed as she leaned back.

I wanted to slap the smirk off her face.

I tightened my jaw.

“Are you going to tell Mama and Daddy?” I asked.

Edith’s legs were crossed, and her foot was bouncing again. I hated that bouncing foot and the smug look on her face. She shrugged.

“I dunno,” she said. “Maybe.”

I turned away from her to face my desk and snatched up my journal.

“Do whatever,” I snapped, but hoped she wouldn’t.

Edith threw her head back and cackled – it’s the only way to describe the noise that came out of her.

“Little Blanche out partying with a bad boy,” she said. “What would Daddy think of his little bookworm running around with – not a boy – but a man like Hank Hakes?”

I scribbled in my journal, pretending to ignore her taunts.

“Whatcha writing in there? ‘Tonight, Hank kissed me. It made me weak in my knees!’?”

She laughed and I reached towards the bed, grabbing a pillow and roughly tossing it at her face.

She giggled, falling back as it hit her.

“Oh, Blanche, calm down. I’m not telling Mama and Daddy anything. As long as you tell me all about your night out . . .”

“It was just some dancing.”

“You danced?”

“Not well, but yes.”

Edith smiled, startling me as she suddenly stood to give me a hug.

“I’m so proud of my little sister,” she said. “She’s finally having some fun.”

‘Franny’: A little piece of fiction

A little bit of fiction – not yet connected to a story. Come back tomorrow for another section of “A Story To Tell”.


No one wanted to be nice anymore and everyone was always staring down at their phones.

That’s how Franny Beiler felt about the world these days and she wasn’t afraid to say it.

When she was young people actually talked to each other, face to face. No, they didn’t always say nice things and they didn’t always get along, but they were a lot more alert and a lot less like a brain dead zombie; that much she knew.

The feet of the rocker hit the porch hard as Franny pushed her feet down. She felt turned up inside and angry at the world. She knew it wasn’t right but darn it, she was tired of being visited only if the battery on one of those darned cellphones died and her grandchildren were bored.

“Oh, Mom, there is nothing wrong with them being on their devices from time to time,” her daughter Hannah had lectured as she unpacked the groceries earlier that day. “They aren’t hurting anyone and some of their games are educational. Just because you didn’t have technology like this when you were younger doesn’t make it bad.”

Hannah closed the refrigerator door.

“Now, I got you that bread you like and some more of that ham you can slice up for your dinner. Robert will be over later with some dessert and to fix the buzz in the TV. Is there anything else I can do for you?”

Anything else she could do? Why? So she wouldn’t feel guilty for rarely visiting her own mother and always being too busy to stop and talk awhile?

“No, thank you.” Franny’s top lip had disappeared against the bottom as Hannah leaned down and kissed her cheek and walked toward the front door. 

“Call if you need anything,” she said casually as she closed the front door.

“Always nice to be talked at and not to,” Franny mumbled to herself as she rocked.

Franny knew she shouldn’t be so uptight and disgusted with everyone and everything but lately the frustration simply seemed to spill over. It was spilling over even more as she thought about her daughter’s condescending tone. She increased the speed of her rocking.

“Hello, there, Miss Franny.”

The voice of Joe Fields, the new pastor of the local Methodist church startled her. She didn’t like being startled and she jerked her head around and leveled a furious glare at the smiling, red faced balding man standing on her porch. 

“Well, good grief. I thought you Southerners were supposed to be polite. No one taught you not to scare an old lady?”

If the pastor was surprised by her snappy response he didn’t show it.

“I’m sorry Miss Franny. I have been told I have a quiet way about me and I guess that didn’t work out as a good thing this time.”

He laughed easily. Franny didn’t.

He stopped laughing and cleared his throat.

“Did my daughter send you here to talk me into coming back to church?” Franny snapped.

Pastor Fields found himself clearing his throat again. Suddenly he felt like he was 10-years old.

“Well, no, I mean, yes, but that wasn’t exactly what she said – I mean..”

The chair creaked loud as it rocked.

“Or did she send you here to tell me she’s sending me to a nursing home?”

“Oh. I-no-“ the pastor laughed nervously. “That wasn’t something she – I mean, she didn’t ask me about – or that is to say that I don’t know of any such plan –“

“Not sure I’d ever want to go to church with a preacher who can’t seem to figure out how to finish a  sentence ,” Franny said tersely.

Joe wasn’t sure if he should laugh or run  back to his car and drive away.

“Well, yes..anyhow, Miss Franny, I just stopped to tell you that anytime you want to come to church, I’d be glad to send someone to pick you up.”

He spoke quickly, before she struck him down with her tongue again.

“I’ll keep you updated,” she said dryly, looking  away from him to watch the neighbor’s pick up pass by the house. Henry Sickler waved and Franny lifted her hand in a quick movement and then laid it back on the rocker arm.

“Well, that would be –“

“But don’t hold your breath,” she quipped, still not looking at the young pastor.

Joe cleared his throat again and nodded.

“Well, okay then. Is there anything else I can do for you, Miss Franny?”

“Stop calling me Miss Franny for one. He may be dead but I’m still a Mrs. Thank you very much.”

“Of course. I’m so sorry. I meant no disrespect, ma’m. Down South we just use the term ‘Miss” as a sign of affection or respect.”

Franny felt a twinge of guilt. Maybe she really was being too hard on the young man. He was just trying to be nice, to do what he felt was his calling, or whatever. She decided to throw him a line and hoped he wouldn’t strangle himself with it.

“That’s fine. I’m sure you didn’t mean to be rude.”

She focused her eyes on a bird on the bush next to the porch instead of looking at him.

“If you ever need to talk – you know – about your loss . . .”

Franny snorted and rolled her eyes. Good God he’d just hung himself from the nearest tree.

“I don’t talk about loss,” she snapped. “There is no sense in talking about such things. If that’s all, it’s time for my afternoon nap. You probably have a nursing home or two in town to visit so don’t let me stop you.”

Joe stood slowly.

“Well, yes, uh, I should be going. You’re right.”

He tried to smile, to ignore the internal feeling that he wasn’t able to hit a home run on one of his first home visits as the new pastor.

“You have a good day, Miss- I mean Mrs. Tanner,” he said softly and at the risk of being yelled at again he added: “I meant what I said about being here if you ever need to talk.”

Franny nodded curtly without looking at him. She listened to him him step off the porch, walk down the sidewalk and to his car. When the sound of his car faded she tightened her jaw and fought the tears. She would not cry. She’d cried enough tears in the two years since Ned had died. She didn’t need to be reminded of all she had lost that day and she didn’t need to be reminded Ned wasn’t there anymore. Not by her family and certainly not by some upstart pastor from the South.

I would never have made it as a pioneer or the day smoke filled our house and I called my husband for advice before I called 911

My 4-year old had been talking to me all day. Every time I sat down she “needed” something. So when she called for me the 18th time in less than five minutes after I’d sat down, my hormonal induced crankiness led to me shouting out “WHAT NOOOOOOW?”

She was standing in the dining room, pointing through the doorway to the kitchen, at the ceiling, her eyes big.

“Is all that smoke supposed to be there?” she asked in her cute little voice.

“What NOOOOOWWW?” I asked, now annoyed at life in general, instead of her.

I stomped toward the kitchen and saw it – the smoke billowing out at me like an old pick-up truck with a bad muffler.

I wasn’t daunted in my crankiness. I stomped some more – right across the kitchen floor – seething as I struggled to open the kitchen window, which is too high for this midget woman to reach, and realized it was locked. (I’m not officially a midget. I’m just super short.) I climbed up on the sink and flicked the locks and the window open with all the ferocity of a woman with raging hormones.

I waved my way through the smoke and smashed the cancel button on the stove, coughing and shouting at my daughter to “get into the other room and away from the smoke.”

I waited for the smoke to stop billowing out of the stove as I flung the back porch door open to try to convince the smoke to travel out of the kitchen.

The smoke didn’t stop and now my son was coughing.

“Ummm…ummmm..go get the fire extinguisher,” I told my son.

We have had that fire extinguisher for more than 16 years, most likely, and have never used it. I have no idea what I thought I was going to do with it since I wasn’t even seeing flames, only smoke. I also contemplated it might explode when I pulled the pin from it, if I could even figure out where the pin was.

I struggled to pull the pin and sprayed it wildly into the smoke. Now there was smoke and fire extinguisher dust billowing out into my house so I knew I had to do something besides standing there with my mouth hanging open  – like call 911. But I didn’t want to call 911. There weren’t any flames and the smoke would probably stop eventually and then I’d feel stupid with a bunch of firefighters standing in my front yard and kitchen, looking at me like I was a crazy woman who had cried wolf.

The local emergency responders don’t do anything simple in my area, which is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing if you have a real emergency and a curse if you merely have a possible emergency. They’d probably call out the ladder truck and it would come screaming up my street and then 10 pick-up trucks with flashing lights would rip onto the curb and in my yard and the men would run in with hoses and axes and all the gawkers would walk by the corner to see what was happening because this town is so small there is literally little else to do other than see where the firetrucks are going.

My mind raced to all the fires I’d had to cover for the newspaper and how half the time I had to try to shoot photos of the emergency around rubberneckers who did little else other than get in the way and speculate how the fire started.

(Please know the previous sentences are just a little teasing because our local firefighters are awesome and in desperate need of volunteers. I knew they’d be great and I just didn’t want to waste their time on a little smoke.)

I told my kids to go outside on the porch and called my husband first to gauge if I really needed to call the fire department. Yes. I called my husband. Be quiet.

“Honey, we have an emergency but I don’t know if I should -”

“What’s the emergency?”

“There is smoke billowing out of the stove and -”

“Why are you calling me?! Call the fire company!”

“But it will probably stop and – ”

“Honey, it’s time to call the fire company. Call them now.”

I told the kids (who had apparently gone deaf due to the smoke since I’d already told them to go outside but they were back inside) to pick up the couch cushions my daughter had been using to “build a tower” because there would be firefighters walking through the house and I didn’t want them to trip on them.

“911. What’s your emergency?”

“Well there is smoke filling my house from the stove but the stove isn’t on fire – it’s just the smoke keeps billowing out and the house isn’t on fire but – OH MY GOSH! GET THE DOG! GET THE CAT AND WE WILL PUT HER IN THE VAN! WHY IS THE DOOR STUCK AGAIN! THE DOOR IS STUCK?! CLIMB IN THE FRONT WINDOW THEN!”

I looked down and realized I had committed the cardinal sin of 911 calling. My sister-in-law, a 911 dispatcher in another county, had told me never to hang up on the dispatcher because the dispatcher can help walk you through how to handle an emergency until fire fighters arrive on the scene. I had hung up on the dispatcher without realizing it and was mortified when it hit me what I had done. Oops.

Since I had explained to the dispatcher that the house wasn’t on fire, before I hung up on her anyhow, the local firefighters (did I mention they are all volunteer and really great guys?) calmly pulled up to the house. The first volunteer couldn’t get through our front door because it is broke and had jammed into the metal frame when we let it slam while we were running out (we are redneck like that). He climbed through the front window and yes, I was mortified but I was sitting on the ground, holding on to the collar of the dog because we hadn’t been able to find her leash before we dragged her out of the smoke so I just let the embarrassment roll over me like it usually does. Being embarrassed is a normal state for me, I should add.

We left the cat inside and hoped she would fend for herself.

A woman was parked across the street and shouted over to me: “Are you okay? Do you need anything?”

I let her know it was just some smoke from the oven, I was sure it was fine, but thanked her.

“If you need anything let me know!” she called from her truck and drove away and that’s when I wanted to shout back: “Thank you! But I have no idea who you are!”

An acquaintance drove by and stopped in the middle of the street in her very large SUV and shouted out “Lisa! What happened!? Are you okay?”

“Yep! Just smoke from the oven!” I shouted back, wondering if a firefighter was going to tell her to get out of the way at some point, but grateful for her concern.

I was bewildered. Why was everyone freaking out? It was just some smoke in the kitchen. It wasn’t until later my son and I figured out that first, I was sitting on the ground in our front yard, slightly hunched over while I held the dog and probably looked like I had been overcome with smoke, and second, there was smoke pouring out of our kitchen window behind me. I never noticed the smoke pouring out so I was pretty calm about it all, not really letting my mind travel to the worst-case scenario.

Being calm in a situation like this is fairly unusual for me so my son said he was surprised to see me simply “chilling out” on the front lawn like having firefighters run into our house was an everyday thing. One of the first official responders on scene was a local police officer whose shift had ended a few moments before the fire department was toned out. I felt like a complete moron for calling them when he asked if I had seen flames and I had to admit I hadn’t. My worry had been  how fast the house was filling with smoke and I couldn’t even get into the kitchen to see what was happenig.

I was sure that by the time they got there all the smoke would be gone, like that time I took the van to the mechanic and said it was pulling to the right and he said “It drives fine for me!”. The off-duty police officer assured me that they had indeed seen smoke billowing from an odd spot in the stove, so I wasn’t totally crazy (not totally), and because they couldn’t see flames they were dragging it out into the backyard as a precaution.

This removal of the stove essentially meant that the already failing appliance was now officially – toast – ha! See what I did there? Well, if not “toast” it was “dead.” `

I have to admit, I still feel guilty for calling, even though the firefighters kept telling me it was better to be safe than sorry. I did catch a look of disappointment on the face of one of the firefighters wearing all his gear. What a waste having to gear up for a bunch of smoke. Poor guy. (Note: I am being serious, not sarcastic. Poor guy! It was a boring call and I wouldn’t blame him if he was disappointed.) I thanked the firefighters and told them I knew they don’t have enough volunteers. They admitted they don’t.

“We’re hurting,” the fire chief told me and I immediately wished I didn’t have a bunch of weird autoimmune stuff going on so I could suit up and help out.

For one brief moment, I also wished I was still working at the local newspaper so I could write an article to urge locals to volunteer for the fire department and help their neighbors in an emergency. That feeling dissipated when I remembered the scars still left from the newspaper days.

Once the firefighters were gone we began looking for the cat and I began to realize several of my emergency response failings and that I would have never made it as a pioneer. When my husband chose to mock me later for calling him before 911 I defended myself by explaining: “Well, if there had been flames I would have called 911 first, but it was just smoke.” I decided not to mention the phrase “where there is smoke there is fire,” because that might have given him more ammunition than I cared for him to have.

The cat, incidentally, wondered downstairs about 15 minutes after all the excitement was over, blinking her eyes at me as if to say “What were you all stressed about? I’ve been upstairs sleeping the whole time.”

For now, we are cooking in an Instapot and an electric fryer until we figure out if the homeowner’s insurance will cover the cost of a new stove. If not, we will probably be cooking in the electric fryer and the Instapot for a while longer until we save up for one.

Two days after the fire the insurance company sent a guy to clean our kitchen. He scrubbed it from top to bottom. I didn’t even know our cupboards were that color. I told him I wish there had been some smoke and fire extinguisher dust in the rest of the house so he could clean it all.

He laughed.

I laughed.

Then I told him I was completely serious.

So that was my exciting day(s) last week, what excitement did you have? Let me know in the comments or link me to a favorite post that tells me.

Favorite blog posts around the web this week

I thought I’d share some of my favorite blog posts from around the web this week because I’ve read a few really good ones. I’d also love to offer you an opportunity to share one of your favorite posts from the week from your own blog, or from another blogger.

1) I enjoyed this post about patriotism from Mama Duck. She asked what’s happened to patriotism in the United States today and shared how much the 75th anniversary of D-Day awakened her patriotism even more.

2) I have a discovered a new-to-me short fiction site called Lunch Break Fiction. I suppose this particular blog post about a man accidentally throwing out some important books that belonged to his wife is, of course, fictional, since it is tagged “flash fiction” but it’s so hilarious I am really hoping it might have some truth in it.

 

3) I agreed with this post from Kat at The Lily Cafe about books that feature unnecessary swearing.

“I find cursing to be crude and unsophisticated. I also appreciate the power of words and words like enraged, furious, and incensed carry more power than pissed off. Total honesty. I cringed just writing that. And that’s probably being mild.”

 

4) I could definitely relate to this post by Ordinary on Purpose since I also have a tween in my house. It’s a good reminder that yes, they are growing up, but yes, they will still need you and love you for awhile too.

 

5) As a photographer who considers myself more documentary than anything, I really enjoyed this post by Lauren Webster who followed a married couple while they planted a garden in their backyard.

Please leave me a link to a favorite post of yours or another favorite post by another blogger in the comments!

 

No longer making the first contact

Me, for years: “Hey, friend, haven’t heard from you in a long time. How are you?”

Friend: “Oh my gosh! So glad you messaged, called, texted! I’m great! It was so nice to hear from you! How nice! Bye!”

Friend for years: SILENCE SILENCE SILENCE SILENCE

Me, finally: “Hey, friend, haven’t heard from you in a long time. How are you?”

Friend: “Oh my gosh! So glad you messaged, called, texted! I’m great! It was so nice to hear from you! How nice! Bye!”

Friend for years: SILENCE SILENCE SILENCE SILENCE

So this has gone on with a number of my “friends” for about 20 years. I contact, they thank me and then I never hear from them to ask me “Hey, are you still alive? Did you die or fall off the face of the earth?” Until I am the one to contact them again.

So, this year I’ll be 42 and I’m pretty tired of games and I’m pretty tired of being the one who does the contacting but is never contacted.

So, this year – I stopped.

And no one noticed.

A little chaos in my weekly review

A little chaos reigned for me a few weeks when I watched the movie “A Little Chaos” on Netflix. The basic plot is that Kate Winselt is a designer or a builder or a large breasted woman they needed to look forlorn and longingly at the guy who was also a gardener or a designer or whatever for the king. She is hired to design a fancy concert hall/garden for King Louise VIII (Alan Rickman) and few seemed phased she’s a woman building for the king in 1800 whatever. She’s a woman with tragedy in her past and it takes the entire movie to figure out what her tragedy is.

I believe all the characters are supposed to be French but only the gardener and a couple other characters have actual French accents. The rest have British accents. Not sure what that was about. It sort of reminded me of Robin Hood when Kevin Costner kept losing his British accent and slipping back into Brooklyn or something.

I spent most of the movie trying to figure out why Kate seemed the only woman who wore a dress that pushed her breasts up and almost out completely.

I guess the French were (and are?) an open group but I was really getting confused over who was sleeping with whom as well.

And is it bad that every time I saw Alan Rickman all I could think was “why does the king look like Captain Hook?”

All in all, there was still something charming about the movie. The scenery and sets were beautiful, the costumes were breathtaking, the plot fairly predictable.

Would I watch it again? Not unless I needed another good giggle.

Also in the movie department, I found myself completely delighted with Tea with the Dames on Amazon. This was one my brother mentioned to me when we were talking about another movie. The Dames are Maggie Smith, Judi Dench, Joan Plowright and Eileen Atkins. Once a year they meet in the country and chat and “talk shop” so to speak. The movie is a documentary and features the women chatting about their careers, what it meant to become a “dame” and their time as actresses on the stage.

In case your curious, here is a trailer to give you an idea what it’s about:

In the book realm, I am finishing up All Creatures Great and Small by James Herriott and A New Song by Jan Karon.

It was nice of my brother to ruin Herriott’s books for me a bit when he told me that wasn’t his real name. After looking up the reason why James Alfred Wight used a pen name, I understood better and accepted that it wasn’t appropriate for veterinarians at the time to promote themselves so he felt it was better not to use his real name. He also changed the names of those in the books, to protect the innocent and not-so-innocent. The fact James Herriott isn’t his real name doesn’t take away from the witty and touching stories in the book for me like I thought it might. I have learned not to talk to my brother about books I’m reading if he has already read them. Who knows what else he will feel compelled to tell me – maybe the endings of one or two.

I’ve been reading All Creatures Great and Small on my Kindle, which is connected to the Kindle my mom uses. She’s on my account and we share Kinde Unlimited. Normally we are reading different books at different times but Mom started All Creatures Great and Small after me and blew through it before I was done. I almost attempted a competition when my Kindle would notify me that another device registered in my name had made it to a page further than I had, but then I remembered my mom is retired I am a mom with two young children, a needy dog, a pushy cat and a newspaper editor husband who asks me to proof his weekly columns. I finally gave it up and let her blow right past me and finish the book before me, even though I had been reading it for a month longer than her. That’s how slow of a reader I am.

A New Song is a slight departure from Karon’s other books in the series because the story takes place outside of Mitford, N.C., which is where most of Karon’s other books about Father Tim Kavanaugh take place. In case you’ve never read the books, the main character is Father Tim, an Episcopalian priest who lives in the small town of Mitford. The books are about his adventures and how they relate to the quirky, fun, and sweet characters in the town. If you’re looking for something light and not very deep then Karon’s books are for you.

Next up on my book list to read or finish is The Cuckoo’s Calling by Robert Galbraith, All Things Bright and  Beautiful (after I finish All Creatures Great and Small) by James Herriott and On Writing by Stephen King.

As for what I’ve been writing on my blog lately: here are some links to my recent posts:

When You Finally Stop Waiting for the Calls to Come

A New Beginning For A Small Pennsylvania Farm

And the fifth part in my fiction story “A Story to Tell”

So what are all of you reading or watching or even writing ? Feel free to share here or find out what others are reading by visiting Readerbuzz’s weekly wrap up and Sunday Salon feature on her blog.

A new beginning for a small Northeastern Pennsylvania farm

” Don’t worry,” the 14-year-old told me as he climbed in the driver seat of the doorless Ranger all-terrain vehicle. “I’m a better driver than my mom.”

He grinned.

I knew he was talking about the bumpy, high-speed trip his mom had taken my husband on about a week before when the family’s cows escaped the pasture while my husband was there to do a story for the local weekly newspaper. His mom, Eileen Warburton, assured my husband that the escape wasn’t his fault, but rather the fault of an exuberant family dog who had startled the cows .

She didn’t normally drive so fast, she told me, but it was important to get ahead of the cows to try to herd them back into the fenced-in pasture. I couldn’t help wishing I had been there to see my semi-city slicker husband holding on to the grab handle of the Ranger for dear life, a look of sheer terror in his eyes as they careened over the dirt roads and muddy cow pasture.

I know, I have a warped, slightly sadistic sense of humor.

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More than once since visiting farms in our area I have been amazed by the knowledge, politeness, and efficiency shown by children who grow up on a farm. They are well spoken, mature and handle themselves better than many adults. They engage visitors to their farm with wisdom and a sense of professionalism that most businesses don’t even possess. Children who grow up on a farm are eager to tell you how the farm works, what the livestock eat, how they herd the cows, milk to the cows, feed the cows or pigs or any other variety of aspects of a working farm.

They are also almost always confident and not in the least bit intimidated to talk to adults. I’d have to say that most of the credit for the demeanor of a child or children who grow up on a farm goes to their parents and grandparents or whomever else they work with, and live with, on the farm. They are taught, first of all, hard work and with that hard work often comes a love for God, family, country, the land, and their livestock. For families who farm, especially on a small family farm, farming isn’t only a source of income, it’s an entire lifestyle.

“Is that mud on her side?” Eileen asked when the 14-year old, Blaine, walked their prize Jersey cow Cardinal out of the barn that day. “I guess we’ll have to wash her again.”

I don’t live a very exciting life so the idea of watching a cow being washed was exciting. I trailed along behind the boy and the cow somewhat like a giddy child who has been promised a trip to the playground. I’ve visited a few farms in the last couple of years while taking photos for a personal photo project focusing on the joys and trials of family farming. I’ve apparently grown accustomed to the smells of barns because I barely noticed when Cardinal decided to deposit a large amount of fresh manure while patiently waiting for Blaine to finish brushing and spraying her down. I am either accustomed to the smell or my clogged sinuses, courtesy of spring allergies blocked it from me.

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DSC_7812DSC_7816DSC_7820DSC_7823Off to one side of where the cleaning was happening, and behind the main barn, was a pile of stone and the future site of the family’s bottling facility for a future-planned business in processing A2 milk. According to the A2 Milk Company, all milk contains two different kinds of proteins – A1 and A2. A2 milk comes from cows who only produce the A2 protein.

Some dairy farmers say A2 milk is more easily digested by people who otherwise have difficulty digesting milk with both proteins. Those with lactose intolerance may be able to digest the A2 milk easier, but because their intolerance is to the sugar (lactose) in the milk, they would still need to consume the A2 milk with caution and maybe special enzymes, Eileen told me. Most people with lactose intolerance are able to drink lactose-free milk, such as the brand name Lactaid milk.

A quick search online will show you there is a quite a bit of controversy about the benefits of A2 milk for those who otherwise have difficulty digesting milk. Consumers seemed thrilled with the prospect of having access to milk that is potentially easier  to digest, but there are those in the dairy industry who are skeptical that there is any superior benefit of A2 milk. Some a market to promote it as a threat to the overall dairy industry.

“It’s just a theory at this point in time,” Greg Miller, National Dairy Council Chief Science Officer recently told CBS news. “There is no science that really says that there is any value in a2 protein milk relative to conventional milk. The two studies that were done were with a small number of subjects with different variables that don’t give us the answers we need to tell whether this is really true or not.”

For the Warburton family, scientific research wasn’t necessary. Anecdotal evidence was enough for them. Eileen’s 4-year-old son Marshal has been unable to digest milk or soy since birth, which presented a unique challenge for a child living on a dairy farm. When Eileen read about A2 milk being used in New Zealand she decided to explore the benefits of it further. She tried to order some of the milk for Marshal but the fees to ship it overseas was astronomical. That’s when she began to wonder if any of their own Jersey cows could be producers of A2 milk.

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She pulled hair from the tails of the cows, sent it to be tested and was told that out 10 of the 14 cows tested were A2 milk only producers. The proof would be in the chocolate milk, so to speak, something Marshal had always wanted to be able to consume like his older brother. When Marshal didn’t react to the special treat made with the A2 milk from Cardinal Eileen knew they were on to something. Her family began exploring options of bringing the milk to the area to benefit those with similar digestion issues as Marshal.

I was standing in the Warburton’s cow pasture on a warm May day to photograph the boys with their first A2 cow, Cardinal. Photographing Cardinal alone was also on the agenda. Like I’ve said before, it doesn’t take much to excite me so when we headed to the upper pasture with the boys and a wooden bench I was giddy once again but this time to see all the cows gathering around us like five-ton, manure covered and smelly, curious children.

Big brown eyes looked at us and broad noses sniffed and nuzzled to see if we’d brought any hay or grain. Once Blaine sat on the bench the ladies gathered around him in a semi-circle to see what their boy was doing.

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Standing on the hill, overlooking the rest of Forks and Overton Township and the Warburton’s farm, I thought about how blessed my family is to live in an area where children are taught from a very early age about hard work and respect for the land, animals, and nature. We are blessed to have people living around us who have personal knowledge of, and a part in, where our food comes from.

I’ve learned in the last couple of years that working and living on a small family farm is not easy, but it is worth it in ways that have nothing to do with money.

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To learn more about A2 milk, visit A2 Milk Company’s site HERE or check out the story below that CBS Morning featured in 2017. The Rocket-Courier also published a story about the farm on their site today and that story can be found via their website HERE. 

 

 

To read more of the posts I’ve featured about farming or farms in our area, click on the following links:

Tell Me More About . . . Mark Bradley, dairy farmer

The Heartache is Real as Family Farms Start to Fade Away

The Farm

The State of Dairy Farming in Pennsylvania

Tell Me More About . .  . Engelbert Farms, Nichols, N.Y.

 

 

When you finally stop waiting for the calls to come

I used to check my phone often. Maybe a friend would call or message or send an email even. But, no, the messages never came. I sent emails and texts and sometimes I even called but rarely did the calls get returned or a message sent unless I sent one.

Just recently I stopped looking at my phone. I realized I wasn’t going to be called any time soon. I wasn’t going to be emailed either. I wasn’t going to be asked how I was doing. I wasn’t going to be invited to a concert or an event or asked if I wanted to grab lunch together. I finally gave up and bought lunch for myself and ate it alone.

One reason I deleted my personal Facebook account was so I would stop looking at the blank messenger box and feeling depressed. I was starting to feel very pathetic as I looked at it expectingly, every day, only to be disappointed that either a person hadn’t responded to my last message six months ago or not one so-called “friend” had messaged to see how I was.

I should add that since deleting Facebook not one of the people on that oh-so-special “friends list” has asked me where I am or if I am okay. Not one. I read an article one time about a man who deleted his personal Facebook account and all his friends thought he’d died and called to check on him. Apparently, all my friends already thought I was dead and didn’t even bother to check.

It’s weird to get myself out of the habit of checking email or messenger, hoping someone cares enough to ask if I’m alive, but once you finally decide you don’t care anymore it makes it easier. It’s not that I don’t care I don’t have any friends left but I guess if I am meant to have friends again, God will provide them at the right time. For now, I am trying to start my day with a devotional and spend my days not expecting any contact from people who used to say I was important to them.

It makes my existence a little sad but also a little more free of drama and I would say that’s a good thing.