Faithfully Thinking: Didn’t I tell you to let me handle it?

I am a control freak.

I know it.

My family knows it.

God knows it.

I’m not as bad as some people, no.

But, I’m still someone who likes to control situations around me – mainly any situation I feel could affect my own well being or that of a family member.

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If I think I can do something to change a situation for the better, I will do it, or at least attempt to do it. Often, though, I can not change a situation and I still lay there at night and try to figure out how I can.

For instance, we need to sell our house, sooner rather than later, so for several nights in a row, I was lying awake, trying to figure out how to get the money to fix this house up so we can sell it faster. I couldn’t figure it out and it was leaving me exhausted and irritated. One night I was laying there, physically tossing in bed while my brain tossed all the possibilities of remedying this situation back and forth. That’s when I heard a voice, of sorts, in my head. Actually, it was more like a sentence that I didn’t put there, so, for me, it was God reminding me of something.

The conversation went something like this:

“Didn’t I tell you to let me handle it?”

“Well, yes, Lord, but . . . ”

“Then let me handle it.”

The conversation was over that quickly.

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God didn’t ask me to figure it all out. He didn’t ask me to find the solution to our need to find a house closer to my husband’s job or figure out how to get people to read my books when I write them (specifically Fully Alive when it is done. This is the book I really feel God was prodding me to write and I’m terrified to continue writing because I feel completely unqualified to do so.) He also didn’t ask me to be the so-called perfect teacher for my children while I homeschool – he just asked me to do it and reminded me he would take it from there.

I’m not good at obeying.

I’m a rebel.

I don’t like to be told what to do, but as a follower of Christ, I need to trust that he knows better than I do about the things of life.

And I need to trust that ultimately God will handle it, whatever “it” is at that point in my life.

 

23 comments

  1. I’m right there with you on being a control freak! I’m not terrible, but I cringe if my husband decides to clean or fold laundry. I keep my mouth shut, but I secretly want to jerk those shirts out of his hands and fold them the right way! LOL I know how you feel about the house situation, too. We’re still working on ours, but to me it’s taking too long and I want to move RIGHT NOW. I know deep down inside that it’s God’s timing, but I’m not too good at waiting sometimes. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I really hope so! My husband is supposed to get his Christmas bonus soon (after Christmas of course) so hopefully we can get started again. We’ve saved a ton by doing it ourselves, but it’s been time consuming.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. We’ve all been there. Wouldn’t it just be simpler if we just listened to our all-knowing and powerful God (who definitely’s got this, whatever it might be) the first time? I commiserate with you because I’ve been there, done that so many times. It’s taken me a few really difficult circumstances in life to finally, FINALLY, let go of my controlling tendency and leave those things I can’t change in God’s capable hands. The first step is listening to His voice and you are on your way.

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    1. Looks like I didn’t respond to this comment all those weeks ago, but yes, why don’t we just listen to him?! I’m getting a little better, but, as I’ll write about tomorrow in a post, this is still a huge struggle for me.

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  3. Over my blogging break, I have kept you in my prayers so much! I sure understand that lying awake at night kind of thing. He really is so good to ask us to keep turning it all back to Him, isn’t He? Just when I think I’ve succeeded, He uncovers another little niggling area. I am thankful that HE knows so much better than I do how to work everything together for His purposes. Love and Blessings to you in this New Year.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh gosh, Bettie! I was praying for you too and telling my mom about your struggles because she also suffers from chronic pain and exhaustion from fibromyalgia (and I’m having some of the same symptoms as her so who knows if I have fibro as well but I don’t have the chronic pain as bad as her or you.). I told her you were such a beautiful soul who wrote out the most beautiful prayers. She and a friend I was talking to at the same time thought that was just lovely and want to check out your blog. God bless you in the New Year and May he sustain you!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. How like our loving Father, who knows us all so well, to give that gentle reminder in his still, soft voice!

    Sometimes he may ask us to study out alternatives, and then bring one or more to him for his advice or approval. Other times, he may delegate some or all of the work to other people, to test their obedience. He may do part of the job himself, and then tell us what our responsibility is to finish it.

    But no matter what course of action God chooses, he is always fully invested in our welfare, and is busy preparing the way forward for us. When he says he’ll handle it, he means it: it’s that simple, but sometimes the hardest things for us to believe about God are the simplest ones.

    Ultimately, our prayers need to be that our spirits will be receptive and understanding of whatever answer he gives us, so we can act with faith upon his counsel.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. This was written so beautifully, Christine. Thank you so much. I’m standing outside for our seventh house showing and I’m worrying again about what I might have done wrong or left out or said wrong to the buyer’s agent when she pulled up. And I heard the thought again: “I’ll handle it.” So I’m trying to remember that.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m working on it, lol. 🙂 I will get there eventaully! Trying to set some goals for myself without wearing myself out with high expectations. That never works out. Praying for your house situation.

        Liked by 1 person

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