Saturday Afternoon Chat: The missing cat, the viral reels that made me no money, and I didn’t leave the house all week (oops)

The flames are curling around the pieces of wood in our woodstove as I write this. My daughter made me a cup of hot cocoa sweetened with maple syrup and it was so good.

Earlier this week we lit the stove one day and didn’t the next, pretty alternating like that all week, because the temperatures were warm, then cold, then warm. Today they are back to cold and I think they are going to stay that way through tomorrow.

My sinuses (and those of my family) are not a fan of the up and down temps of autumn and spring in our area.

I need the weather to pick one temperature and stay there.

I did, however, appreciate the sun and warmth we received this week, even if there was a bit of a chill to it.

This morning I realized that I had not left the house all week. I had no reason to because the Husband took Little Miss to her events and I stayed home and worked on my books, blog posts, social media posts, and washed dishes. I washed dishes all week. That’s how I felt at least. I would finish dishes right before dinner and then everyone would use dishes for dinner and then it would start over. The day our dishwasher died was a very sad day for us, but that’s life.

Usually, The Husband does the dishes and folds the laundry more than I do because he gets to it quicker. I seem to be interrupted every five minutes when I am trying to do something but no one interrupts him, I have no idea why. He’s also just very organized and I am not, which I think I’ve mentioned on here before. I am trying to do a bit better at the housework but if the pile of unfolded laundry in our laundry room is any indication of how I am doing – well, you know how that is going.

On Tuesday I thought we had lost our cat for good when she didn’t show up after being out all night. I woke up early to the sound of Zooma the Wonder Dog barking and when I went downstairs to find out what was going on, our other cat ran in, but not the youngest.

The Husband and The Boy (my now 17-year-old teenager) went to work and when I came downstairs later, I thought I would find Scout, the youngest cat, back inside or on the back porch. She wasn’t there and a quick text to The Husband confirmed that she had not returned that morning. I had to wait a couple of hours for The Boy to come home from trade school to ask him if he had seen her and in that three-hour wait, I had this horrible feeling that she had been hit by a car or eaten by an animal the night before.

Usually, when she comes in in the morning she heads straight to my daughter’s room and curls up with her but she wasn’t there. She is also usually around my feet at some point in the morning.

We do our best to make sure the cats are inside at night because we do have foxes, bears, and occasionally coyotes in the area. A text to my neighbor to see if she had seen Scout made me even more nervous because my neighbor said there had been a huge catfight that morning in her backyard but she didn’t see which cat it was.

A friend of ours down the street has a male cat that likes to come up and try to act like he lives here and can tell my girl cats to get lost, so I worried he might have attacked Scout, but another neighbor also has a cat that fights with my cats (or vice versa).

When The Boy came home, I decided not to mention the cat’s disappearance to him because it was his birthday and I didn’t want him to be worried about her on his birthday. Finally, though, I asked him if he’d happened to see her when he walked to the bus for school.

“Yeah, I let her in this morning,” he said.

So, at some point, she’d been in the house.

That’s when I asked my daughter if she had been in her makeshift fort that morning (she has turned one of our couches to face our large window and has her stuffed animals and toys in there for her own little safe haven). She ran to the fort and – yes, there was the cat. She’d been there the whole morning and completely ignored me while I called for her. I felt stupid for not checking in the fort since she loves to curl up there.

This is the second time in two weeks Scout has done something like this, which should be a sign to me that I need to stop worrying about her and accept that she’ll show up eventually.

Now that the weather is colder, I want to make more soups for dinners and lunches. Earlier this week I made chicken noodle soup. I cooked a whole chicken in the Instapot and later added some carrots and farfalle pasta. The one thing I forgot about cooking a whole chicken down in the Instapot is that the bones crumble so you have to strain the broth and catch them in a strainer.

The only problem is that I don’t have a strainer right now so I tried to pick them out. That didn’t work great since we still found some bones in the soup. Hopefully I’ll get better at the soup making as winter sets in. Also, I’ll hopefully get a strainer.

My plan this week is to make butternut squash/sweet potato soup and maybe vegetable beef (we had some beef left over from the week before last and I froze that) and potato and ham soup. I’ll keep you updated on how that goes.

On Thursday I created a reel on Instagram to promote the blog post feature that Erin from Still Life, With Cracker Crumbs and I do together. It was simply a clip of the documentary we watched about dames Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, Joan Plowright, and Eileen Atkins with a quote from the clip above it. I tossed it up and moved on with my day because usually Erin and I don’t get a lot of views on those reels or on our blogs (which is fine – we do this stuff mainly for fun and distraction for us and our blog readers).

By the end of Thursday I had a lot of people commenting on the reels or liking it. By Friday morning I had some 250,000 views and even more comments and shares.

By Friday night the number was 450,000 or so and the comments kept coming from people who just loved the clip and said how happy it made them.

This morning the number was 1.2 million. As of the time I am writing this, it is at 2 million plus views, 56.2 thousand shares, and 809 comments. I have reached 1.3 million accounts

What does all this mean? Will it help me sell books or make money or … do anything exciting with my life?

Nope. None of that really at this point. I don’t get paid on Instagram for my posts and people are liking this video but they aren’t really there for my books. I did gain more followers but, again, they are following me for my posts that aren’t related to my books.

And, honestly? That’s okay because the clip is bringing people joy and one thing I realize as the number of views increase on this is how hungry the world is for joy right now.

Here is a link to the reels:

There is so much sadness, hatred, depression, darkness, and hopelessness. Escaping for even three minutes as we watch four legendary actresses laugh and tease each other is a blessing. Then finding out we can escape for 90 full minutes? Whew! That’s a Godsend for many people right now. I’m glad that people were able to enjoy that clip.

So often lately I am trying to figure out how I can use any kind of social media success to help my family financially as we struggle, but most of the time it is enough that something I put out there gives people joy.

Sometimes we look for a bigger meaning in the things we do in life and I think it is okay if there isn’t a bigger meaning beyond what we did, saw, heard, read, or participated in that brought us joy.

If you want to read the blog posts where Erin and I talked about the documentary, you can find my post HERE and Erin’s post HERE.

How was your week last week? Did you do anything exciting?

Do you like to cook soups when the weather is colder? What kind of soups are your favorite to make or eat?

Why I can’t seem to get myself back on Instagram

I was off Instagram for almost a month and I don’t feel really interested in going back to it. I did log back on this week and as usual my visual brain was completely overloaded and I started stressing over politics (because while people used to just post photos, now they think they have to be social justice warriors at all times), stressing over the sad stories of people dying, and feeling completely inadequate as a mother because I don’t take my children on fancy European vacations. I did contemplate faking a European vacation and posting about that but since I’m pretty sick and tired of the “fakeness” of social media, I decided against that.

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To me, Instagram has become a place for voyeurism and a chance to brag about trips or wealth in an attempt to be validated by a bunch of strangers.

I used it to share my photography simply because I enjoyed connecting with other photographers but there was a time I got caught up in the validation cycle too. I would look at the numbers of likes and comment on posts, hoping others would comment or follow back. This was very short-lived, however, because the idea of networking with a bunch of strangers for attention made me sick to my stomach. And the idea that having a bunch of likes and followers would translate to paying photography customers was looking more and more ridiculous, probably because the photography business was an obvious failure for me.

Now that I could care less about being validated by a bunch of strangers, I hesitate every time I start to post a photo. I mean – who cares if my kid jumped off a ladder at the pool or played with the dog in the yard? Then again, I guess photos like that can be a distraction from the more self-serving ones and from all the political ridiculousness we see on social media anymore. Posting artistic photos over bragging ones is more my goal since I don’t have fancy trips to photograph or a fancy yacht to relax on.

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I think those of us who don’t get the chance to go on all those fancy trips should remember that the people behind the photos may not have the perfect, awe-inspiring lives we think they do. Their feed may look pristine and exotic but behind the scenes they may be dealing with trials we can’t see. The photos from Honolulu might be beautiful but they may be hiding a broken marriage, abuse or addiction.

And the woman who is on her tenth trip in the year to somewhere exotic may post all those photos because every day she’s pushing down the gnawing fear that she’s going to end up alone. Those trips may be a way to cover up a fracture in her family. Perhaps the woman laying on the beach in a bikini on her social media faced a situation in her life that turned her world upside down so now she’s decided life’s too short not to experience everything she can in her remaining years. Maybe she’s just spent her entire savings on that trip simply to forget about the sadness at home.

In other words, while we (I) shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, we (I) also shouldn’t judge the person behind the Instagram feed by the photos they share.

But back to my Instagram (Me! Me! Me! . . . Just kidding.) I’m not sure what I want to do with it anymore. Like I said, I like posting fun photos of the kids or artistic images I take, but really, I could care less if strangers online know about my personal life so I don’t know if I will be posting much more on Instagram. If I do, I don’t think I’ll be using hashtags to draw more attention to them. I’ll share them for any friends or family who follow me or for any online friends I’ve made.

How about you? Are you an Instagram user or follower? What’s your motivation for using it? For fun? Business? Simple connection? Or validation? None of those reasons are actually bad – they’re just real. Let me know in the comments.

(And yes, I’m sharing photos in this post. For validation? Actually, no. I added photos to this post because my posts have been really bland lately and need some sprucing up.)

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