focusing on the good

This past week was super rough emotionally-wise for a lot of people for many reasons.

I almost didn’t write anything today because when I started to write, I felt a lot of anger and absolute rage at the callousness of people when it comes to the death of others.

I wrote an entire post full of anger and ranting. Then I deleted it all because I remembered a verse my mom has recited to me time and time again when I am angry or down about events in the world.

Paul, writing to the church of Phillipi said, “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.”

Whew. Yeah. I needed that reminder this week.

I have not been focusing on things that are just or pure or lovely at all this week.

I am going to try to change that this weekend and next week, though.

I almost wrote an entire post about the many sad events of last week, but I think today I’ll leave this space as somewhere that we can connect on the lighter, happier things. Bettie Gilbert from BettieG’s RA Seasons helped change my mind when she wrote on the Weekend Traffic Jam Reboot post yesterday: “Thank you for this resting space to connect, Lisa. It really has been such an intense week full of so many prayers.”

Don’t we all need a bit of a resting space right now? Or an escape if you will?

So, just as I was sinking more into depression yesterday, I saw a post about how The Monkees aired for the first time yesterday (September 12) in 1966 and thought, “I’m going to share that on my blog instead.”

Now, I am not old enough to remember this but I did watch reruns of The Monkees on Nikelodeon on my friends’ TV in the 1980s.

I was obsessed with the show and absolutely over the moon when my brother (I believe it was him) found one of their records. Like a real record. For a record player.

I played that thing all the time.

I was probably about 8 or 9 at the time and even though my brother tried to explain they were old now, I just ignored him and skipped around the house singing their songs.

I had the biggest crush on Davy — or the young Davy. Of course, by the time I was watching him, the dude was like in his 40s or 50s. I must say that when I got much older, I realized he had aged very well.

The show was ridiculous but actually quite funny. Last night I watched one of the episodes which I found on YouTube, and it really did hold up well!

I am considering writing a full blog post on the band after I do some more research, but I can say already that I know that the band was formed for the show and their popularity and touring continued after the show ended. I also know only one band member is still alive — Micky Dolenz.

Many of their songs are still heard on the radio today — or at least the oldies station with the most popular probably being “I’m A Believer”, written by Neil Diamond. The song was covered in 2001 by Smash Mouth and featured in the movie Shrek.

Personally, I really liked Daydream Believer and even found myself singing along to it last night. After a week from hell that left me reeling and sleeping very little, it was a healing balm to my soul.

I’ve linked it here for your enjoyment:

I found it interesting that at the end of the one full episode I found, there was an interview with the band about some “demonstrations” going on in L.A. about curfews that had been put in place for teenagers, or those under the age of 21 at least. I clipped that for you and thought I’d share it here too.

Bettie told me that when she likes to read and watch garden journals when her heart is overwhelmed.

She also wrote, “God’s nature soothes my soul.”

For Bettie and all of us, I thought I’d share the photos I took on a drive to take my husband’s truck to a mechanic in the middle of nowhere. They aren’t the best quality but I was struck with the insane beauty of the area.

And Paul said to mediate on what is lovely, so I did that.

I hope you can focus on lovely, just, and noble things this week as you work on healing from whatever might have been hard for you this past week.

Hello! Welcome to my blog. I am a blogger, homeschool mom, and I write cozy mysteries.

You can find my Gladwynn Grant Mystery series HERE.

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A lot of people tend to think of the worst outcome for a situation they are in. We call those people pessimists and I am one of them.

I try not to be, really, but for some reason I always find my brain hopping to what could go wrong instead of what could go right.

I would imagine that even the most optimistic people frequently find their minds bouncing to the “worst what-if scenarios” even when they tell others not to do the same.

A quote from Anne of Avonlea by L.M. Montgomery reminded me that we humans often focus on the possible bad we may face, rather than the possible good.

Eliza shook her head. “Doctors always talk like that to keep people cheered up. I would have much hope if I was her. It’s best to be prepared for the worst.”

“But oughtn’t we to be prepared for the best too?” pleaded Anne. “It’s just as likely to happen as the worst.”

As most of you know (because I’ve posted about it several times) I was recently in the hospital with Covid (and, yes, I will eventually stop talking about it). In the days before I went to the hospital, my thoughts were filled with worst-case scenarios, but I kept trying to push those scenarios away. I truly did not think I would end up in the hospital and I thought if I did, I would be sent home quickly. Even when I imagined something bad happening, my brain would never allow me to go to the worst, worst-case scenario for Covid, which is one, being vented and two, dying.

I had a lot of negative what-ifs in my brain during that time, but I promise I was doing my best to replace them with some positive what-ifs. I was just too tired and sick to really conjure up the positives, I suppose. A pastor’s wife and my mom helped fill me with some of the positives, reciting or texting me verses from the Bible.

One of those verses, Philippians 4:8, helped me immensely.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

After that, I tried to focus on happier thoughts, including focusing on me getting out of the hospital.

On the day the nurse was about to turn my oxygen off, letting me know I no longer needed it, I panicked and started asking what if I couldn’t breathe or my oxygen dropped. Would they put the oxygen back on? The nurse said she would if any of that happened, but she didn’t believe it would. I apologized and told her I always worry about the worst.

She said she understood because she often does the same but has had to remind herself to focus on the positive what-if questions.

“What if everything goes fine? What if I don’t have any issues? What if I do better than expected?”

“We all need to focus a little more on the good that can happen than the bad,” she told me. “Me included.”

Fifteen years ago, I was pregnant with my son, and every time I went to the midwife, I would ask her about all the bad things that could happen.

During one appointment she looked at me and said, “Lisa, why don’t you start thinking about what good will come from this pregnancy instead of what bad can happen during it.”

Oh. Well, there was a new concept.

I worked on it, but here was, and is my problem, I feel like if I don’t learn and know about the bad things that can happen, I won’t be prepared for those bad events when they come.

This might be a valid argument for planning for the worst, but on the other hand, a person can know about the bad, but not focus on the negative so much that the negative possible outcomes overshadow the positive possible outcomes.

I’m sure that thinking the best instead of the worst will be a lifelong battle for me, but it’s something I want to work on. I want to change my negative thinking, dismissing those thoughts instead of claiming them. I want to think the best, not to be naïve enough to think every situation will come out with the best-case scenario but to be brave enough to believe that some situations will.