I’ve read comments online from people who don’t like it when an older parent reminds them that the years go so fast. They don’t like what they feel is a passive-aggressive way of saying that they are a bad parent, that they aren’t slowing down enough and enjoying it.

I, however, often see the comment for what it really is – a feeling of melancholy from the other parent that those early years went by so fast for them they feel like they missed a lot of their children’s childhood.

If I ever say to you that the years go by so fast, I’m offering it to you as a reminder to slow down, soak it up, enjoy the simple things and stop worrying about the dumb little things – mainly what other parents think of you and your parenting. I say these things because so often I have failed at doing them myself.

The childhoods of your children really do go fast. Those early years that are so exhausting and mentally draining, in retrospect, are actually very short, which is a good and a bad thing. It’s good because that time will be short. It’s bad because you’re going to learn so much during that time but you won’t know it until it is over.

Never in your life again will another human being love you or need you as much as that little person loves you and needs you right now.

Never in your life again will you be able to see the world through the eyes of an innocent child and fall in love with being alive again.

I was looking through photos this week from several years ago and, yes, it did hit me how fast the years go by. I was glad I could look back and see that there were days I slowed down and enjoyed it and recorded it. There were many days I soaked it up. I let my kids be kids. I decided I didn’t care what others thought of me. I didn’t care if people driving by our house raised their eyebrows at my kids standing knee-deep in mud they’d made with our hose.

I can look back and know my kids made memories and had real childhoods of exploration. I can look back and know that I was not a perfect mother, but I was a mother who did her best to let my kids be kids. I was, and am, a mother who recognizes it really does go by so fast and that the only way to hold on to it all is to record the memories in writing or visually.

I want to have good memories to record.

They won’t always be good, but I’ll do my best to make sure that a larger portion of them are good.

Reminding parents of younger children that time flies by doesn’t have to be foreboding or scolding.

It can also be encouraging and one of the most loving things you can ever say to another parent.